I've run the circle

It is building up again...
while days have gone by wallowing.

Obsessing over distractions I dig into clay
blind to whats in front of me.

I seem to be running and digging deep every day
For everything that has changed
nothing really has...
I've run the circle
wishing the illusion continued...

The battle awaits.
Beneath the dread, I hope for the silver lining...
while I don the armor again. 

Running away is not the answer

For two days
I ran
and I hid
I ran
and I hid

Running away is not the answer

This hole is not big enough
Two days is not long enough
There is nowhere to go
I dig and I dig
but there is nowhere to hide

I run and I run
I dig and I dig

Hiding is not an option
Running away is not the answer

I eat and I eat
and yet I am empty

I run and I run
I dig and I dig
I eat and I eat

I am empty and there is no escape
Running away is not the answer

Hide

Your truthful words made me hide in shame..
Your words were pure and true
only reflecting what I love about you..
But love I hide now in shame.. 
I am greedy
Unprincipled
Self-centered
.....
So I hide

Tar

Violent madness the sort accompanied by wails and screams..
No calm emptiness of a lobotomy to free.
Just thoughts that pour like boiling tar through me...
Enough enough!!

Porcelain

Scorched earth and pouring rain
From both, shade I seek.
This withered tree is all I see
So over the cliff I run
Hoping for a quick respite.
A world this cruel
A life this fragile

Conversation in the absence of words

The beads of sweat..
whispers a wish for shade.
The feigned interest in the fish-eye stare
murmurs of masked disgust.
The furrowed crinkle
rustle the doubts within me.
The rumour of a smirk
sighs curses from afar.

At sea

Burning behind my eyes
A tightness squeezes my head
tired thoughts swim
A sea of fire and ash